Dating Outside "Type"
Kis Lee dishes on being an Asian woman with a weakness for specific types of men...
After my last long-term relationship fizzled like a soggy match, I called my best friend and told her that I was done with the white guys. I was done with the men with Asian fetish. After I was done with my rant, my friend reminded me that I have my own fetish. Some people say that they don't have a "type," but I think I do. I have an undeniable weakness for tall, lean Caucasian men, and Irish men are my kryptonite.
My best friend was right. Who am I kidding? Looks aren't everything, but physical attraction is the key to chemistry. In my case, I respond to tall, lanky men with blue or green eyes. They are the ones who catch my attention and make me look a second time. From my perspective, men with light-colored eyes are "exotic." I don't know if I can call it a fetish, maybe "preference" would be a better word.
Personally I don't think there is anything wrong with having a dating preference. Some people are equal opportunity daters, and some are not. However it is true that variety is the spice of life. A person who sticks to a certain "type" is limiting his/her options. After dating non-Asian men for most of my adult life, now I am curious about Asian men.
I am almost ashamed to say that I have never dated an Asian man. Sometimes I feel like I am a disgrace to my race. People may assume that I am one of those Asian women who only date Caucasian men. They exist, but I am not one of them. I am attracted to Asian men, but I have never had the opportunity to date one. There was never a conscious effort to disqualify Asians from the dating pool.
I know some people may make the wrong judgments about me. They may think that I hate my own race or that I'm embarrassed to be Asian. I admit that I am somewhat of a "twinkie" (Asian on the outside, All-American on the inside). At the same time, I am very proud of my cultural identity. I love Asian food, music, and films, and I am fluent in my native language. If I haven't dated an Asian man, it's only because I haven't met the right one yet.
After dating "exotic" men for so long, I am ready to try new experiences. I am old enough to know what I want but young enough to still believe in a soul mate. As a newly single woman, I am still waiting for the right one. I don't know if he will be Asian, Irish, or anything in between. I just know that I have my eyes open, and I will not be limiting myself to a certain "type."
Kis Lee is an Asian American freelance writer. Her erotica has appeared or is forthcoming in Good Vibes Magazine, Freyasbower.com, Liquid Silver Books, and Forbidden Publications. You can read more about her erotic writings at her blog and at MySpace.