Skanky Panties & The Business of Faux Fish Juices

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Satan's Angel was telling me that a friend of hers had, a few years ago, tried to talk her into selling panties ~ and I don't mean opening a lingerie store or having one of those lingerie home parties, I mean selling the panties she's worn, right off her own bottom.

Apparently the friend had quite a nice business going, and when Satan's Angel questioned how much she made, how many panties she sold etc. The friend assured her this was very lucrative and that she sold more panties than she could realistically wear.

How's that work, exactly?

Based on Angel's comments to me, here are the finer points of doing volume business in used panties:

Step One: Buy cheap panties from those discount panty bins.

Step Two: Go to grocery store and purchase cans of tuna, white frosting and chocolate frosting.

Step Three: Dip finger into tuna can and apply fish juices to the crotch of the panties.

Step Four: Dip, just the finger tip, into the white frosting and smear that on top of the tuna residue. (Though from what I've heard, some sellers prefer to mix the white frosting and the tuna water together, then apply that 'paste' ~ for a more realistic smell.)

Step Five: To appeal to the potential poo panty lovers, apply bits of the chocolate frosting as skid marks ~ depending upon personal taste (and, I daresay, individual embarrassment levels) the application amount varies.

Apparently, so little of each food product is used that a can of each tints and taints dozens and dozens of panties. (Though I have no hard numbers on it, I daresay hundreds of panties, really.)

So add pennies to each 99 cent pair of panties, for a cost of just over $1 and sell them for $20 or more and that's a lot of profit.

Of course, you'll need to present them to the used-panty-buying-world in order to actually sell them. Which means there's the matter of taking photographs (even if you don't model them or make additional monies via selling models in panties, you have to take photos of the panties themselves), hosting, commerce fees, and other marketing matters; but this is the gist of it.

This practice is apparently wide-spread enough that there is the Panty Trust, "a non-biased, independent, third party verification service" which exists to "promote trust between buyers and sellers for used panties, bras, pantyhose, stockings, socks, shoes, and other personal items."

In order to get the Panty Trust Verified seal of approval sellers must go through a verification process which involves the seller submitting a photograph wearing an item (similar to what they typically offer) along with displaying a hand written sign with the words "Panty Trust" clearly legible, then sending in that item worn in the photograph to Panty Trust for verification.

When the panties (or other intimate items) arrive at Panty Trust Headquarters, it is at this point, I assume, the fine folks at Panty Trust evaluate items for such trickery as non-worn panties masquerading as worn panties. One imagines sniffing is involved, but I am a bit too squeamish as to imaging the possible other standards such as taste tests. (If I were employed thus, I'd certainly pray for fake chocolate skid marks.)

I find it interesting that Panty Trust states that, "Additional telephone or video cam verification if necessary." I'm not sure what good that would do ~ other than documenting the miracle of a particular woman actually being able to demonstrate the creation of her own chocolate flavored poo stains. But it is interesting to ponder...

While I have no need to buy or sell used panties, I have nothing against it ~ unless you promise used and deliver faked; that's just cheating and it is illegal to misrepresent your items for sale. It's nice to know some clever folks have tried to police the world of used panties. And it's good work for those who dream of such things.


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