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Getting Free: You Can End Abuse and Take Back Your Life I wish I could imagine how many lives this book has saved. Not just in the obvious sense, in getting away from a dangerous man without him killing you first. But how many lives have been "saved" in the turning around, finding your spirit and making it the life you want and deserve?  Ginny NiCarthy has written a bible for abuse victims, a how-to guide to becoming abuse survivors, abuse escapers. Getting Free covers subjects other DV books never even touch, such as lesbian abuse and what to do when you're horny as a three-peckered billy goat and tempted to go back to that man because at least you were getting laid when you were with him!
I've read a great many books on this subject and one remarkable thing about this one is that it doesn't carry itself off in the land of psychology to explain why abuse happens.
Understandably, we try very hard to understand the reasons for it, but in doing so we give them excuses for it--complicated personality disorders, insidious self-esteem issues, substance abuse or being a victim of abuse as a child. According to NiCarthy, the truth is none of these so-called "causes" of abusive behavior have been shown to have a true correlation to abuse. She takes a refreshingly simple no-nonsense feminist approach: abuse is about control and they do it because society has allowed and even encouraged the control of women for centuries. Thankfully, it is changing.
I do wonder about the wisdom of an abuse victim reading this book when she most needs it: when she's considering, planning or attempting to get out. The book cover proclaims its message loud and clear and its purpose is likely to provoke more than mere polite interest from the abusive partner when he notices what she's reading.
Review by Tess.
Title: Getting Free: You Can End Abuse and Take Back Your Life
Author: Ginny NiCarthy
Publisher: Seal Press; 4th edition (October 10, 2004)
ISBN: 1580051227
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