True Love Waits

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My best friend Ro told me once that she signed a True Love Waits contract when she was young. It was kind of a funny story. But it made me curious to know... is that TLW thing still around?

Are they still working on kids today, teaching this great load of crap that will likely bring thousands of young people through the disastrous life-wrecking hell of premature marriage and eventual divorce? I googled it and discovered to my horror TLW is alive and well:

True Love Waits® is one of several approaches to challenging teenagers and college students to make a commitment to sexual abstinence until marriage. Created by LifeWay Christian Resources, True Love Waits is designed to encourage moral purity by adhering to biblical principles. This youth-based international campaign utilizes positive peer pressure by encouraging those who make a commitment to refrain from pre-marital sex to challenge their peers to do the same.

True Love Waits has launched “Takes the Town,” an initiative that encourages cities to take a unified, community-wide approach to promoting abstinence by involving schools, government, businesses, churches, health organizations and others. The vision for “Takes the Town” is to help communities find solutions to reclaiming sexual purity among their youth.”

The idea is this: teach kids to wait for “true love” and marriage before having sex. Enforce it by peer-pressuring them into signing the following contract:

"Believing that true love waits, I make a commitment to God, myself, my family, my friends, my future mate, and my future children to a lifetime of purity including sexual abstinence from this day until the day I enter a biblical marriage relationship."

So in our sex-saturated society, our young people should believe that all they have to do in order to experience this fantastic thing called sex that everyone is talking about and doing is to fall in love and get married. How many of those young people have the maturity to understand that they have no clue what “true love” looks or feels like, especially when their bodies are pumped up with hormones and sexual frustration?

Would these conservative Christian fanatics argue with the idea that a person probably isn’t mature enough to choose a mate and enter into a lifelong commitment before the age of 25? Heck, I’d say even 30, but could we get them to agree to at least 25? So then are they seriously suggesting that this campaign would successfully keep sexual purity in our young people until their mid-twenties when they are capable of making the Marriage decision? No, of course not. Nobody’s going to stay a virgin until the age of 25, so all this campaign will do is encourage young people to get married before they should!

The trouble with conservative dualistic thinking is that they imagine that the only alternative to teaching “True Love Waits” is to teach “Go Crazy—Fuck Everybody!” They don’t understand the concept of the huge gray area between “sexual purity” and “sexual maturity,” that a young person can be taught sexually mature and responsible behavior. We can teach our kids that sex is best experienced in a relationship of love and that it should be respected without putting them on the abstinence rack of torture and expecting them to make good life decisions.

I wish I had a daughter, I really do. Oh, what an amazing woman she would be.


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Tess's Room

A lovely tempest, not easily understood, but worth the effort. Sort of like dark bitter chocolate surrounding the sweetest cherry...

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