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I Resolve...... I don't make them...any more.
The beginning of the year is the time most of us make resolutions for change. And the world is out there telling us we should. Have you noticed an increase in weight loss program ads? stop smoking programs? health club ads? The problem with New Year's resolutions is most of us break them in less than two weeks...average is 12 days. Why don't we keep those resolutions? They mean we have to make a lifestyle change of some kind: *I resolve to lose weight
*I resolve to quit smoking
*I resolve to quit dating men not good for me
*I resolve to eat healthy
*I resolve to ....
*I resolve ....
*I ....
The first step in making a resolution work is that we have to want it...really want it. We need to want it for ourselves. If we make that resolution because someone we know wants us to make it, it simply won't work. Just because your children want you to quit smoking will not make it happen. You have to quit for yourself. In fact, if they nag you the success rate may be even lower. Set a specific goal. For me to say "I will eat better" is not a specific goal. For me to say I will eat breakfast, lunch and dinner 5 days a week is specific. Then I have to make plans to carry out that goal: plan meals, fix extra meals on weekends, have supplies for lunch. And what about those days I don't fix a meal? I also have to make plans for what I will do for the meals I miss: have a carton of yogurt handy, order a pizza, or have cereal on hand. I not only have to set the specific goal, but I have to make plans to reach that goal. Choose a measurable goal. I will lose weight is a great goal. But that is nebulous and not measurable. "I will lose 5 pounds in three weeks" is a measurable goal and realistic. It is unreasonable to lose that weight in a week's time; three weeks is a realistic timeline. But, again, you will have to have a plan. Once you have lost that weight, how are you going to keep it off? A crash diet will not keep it off; a life plan will. Create accountability. We are really good at conning ourselves. If there are no consequenes for not reaching our goals, we will not meet them. Recently, on the Rachel Ray Show I saw a woman who has had friends and strangers sponser various pounds she loses. Rachel Ray is sponsoring her 180 pound lost. Get a friend you trust to check with you. The "buddy system" works for getting ourselves to do monthly self-exams for breast cancer. It can work if we are dating people who are bad for us or not doing our monthly exams. And the key is we cannot get mad at our friend for reminding us of our goals. Set your environment up for success. If you are trying to quit smoking, don't have cigarettes around the house. Make it difficult for yourself. If you are doing the "cut-back" and then quit routine, make it harder to get at the cigarettes. If you somke in the car, put them in the trunk; if you smoke after dinner, do the dishes first...by hand. Chanage your lifestyle. If you make any resollution, you are going to be changing your lifestyle. Plan that change. Measure your succes in small steps. Five days of fixing dinner is one unit of success. One week exercising three days a week is a unit of success. Telling that controlling date to take a hike is a success. Every small victory leads to that utimate lifestyle change. And remember, it takes 21 days to make a habit. Your first goal is to make it throught those first 21 days.
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