TMI Tuesdays; What's Bar Room Floors Got To Do With It?

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Slip of a Girl and I sent questions into TMI Tuesday, and now they are officially TMI Tuesday edition #117. Go figure.

1) Do you have/ever had any dating or sex superstitions? (Wear 'lucky jeans' on first date, always light a vanilla candle, etc.) If so, what are they?

Nope. None.

2) If you were stranded on the old deserted island, and a genie appeared who could only grant you one wish -- to bring one of the following people to join you, who would it be?

- your spouse/significant other
- an unrequited love or some person you've had a crush on
- an old/past love
- your best friend

The significant other, of course. How would the old ball & chain function without me?

You think that sounds vain; but really, it's because I care about him. So there. Phhfft.

3) Tell us "weather or not" you're in the mood -- how does rain, snow, sleet, scorching heat, sweltering humidity etc. affect your libido.

I will simply say this: Fucking thunderstorms are fucking fab-u-lous!

4) Are you a crying drunk, an angry drunk, a 'I'm drunk, let's screw' sort of a drinker? (And, if you do not drink -- which one of those things is the reason?)

Depends entirely upon who you are...

Piss me off, and I will feel no reason to be polite about it.

Show me a dead kitten, I'll cry.

Whisper in my ear ~ or just don't show me a dead kitten ~ and I'll screw ya.

I believe you have your answer.

5) Who turns you on the most & why:

the activist
the author
the care-giver/healer (nurse, doctor, masseuse, herbalist, chiropractor etc.)
the comedian
the educator (professor, teacher, mentor etc.)
the model
the musician
the politician
the scientist

I'd select from the A list; the author and activist get me going the most.

But should they, for any reason, be unable to fulfill their duties, anyone other than the model does it.

All because the passion to act out what they care about, despite any real monetary gain, is thrilling, interesting and seductive.

* And I'm talking "musicians" not "rock stars".

Bonus (as in optional): Looking back, what's the one thing you've done which was supposed to be erotic, but didn't quite work out?

It's a tie between:

That time I had sex with Christian on the bar floor while Kat watched... Everything up to that was great at first, but then there's that performance anxiety when one of your best friends is watching you to pleasure herself. And, well, first times are awkward enough without sticky bar floors (which you just keep telling yourself only smells like piss and vomit).

and

That time I had sex on the bar floor with what's-his-face, the bar owner, to get back at Jerry... It was supposed to make me feel powerful, in control, a predator. But there with my backside stuck to the nasty bar floor carpeting, I felt anything but. And my hair! I went home with not just fuck-hair (that knot from moving back & forth on a surface ~ which spares you rug-burn), but the ick of the floor chemically reacted with my hairspray, and it took several shampoos and yanking with a comb to get it out. How did Jerry feel when he found out? I have no idea; I never visited to 'gloat' as I was disgusted. Yeah, that was a good idea.

Clearly, if there is a requirement for gettin' un-lucky sex (the antithisis of #1), bar floors seem to be it.

Want to play along with TMI Tuesday #117? Yah, ya do! Post at your blog or in the comments.

 

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