About Gracie Passette

Gracie Passette is a sex worker, though no longer working directly with clients in the flesh; she now uses media to work with the issues of sexuality. Along with founding Sex Kitten, she runs Cult Of Gracie, curates sexuality, and is The Marketing Whore.

Onaholes: The More The Merrier?

Hey, Hannah Smothers & Cosmo, if you think that the 3fap three-hole masturbation toy for men is confusing and upsetting, well, you must have missed this Fucking Ageist Cantaloupe Sex Toy from six years ago.

While the 3fap offers three holes (mouth, vagina, & ass) the Wet Sucker Setsugekka Orgy Onahole suggests an orgy of one man with at least three different women who each will wait their turns… There are three pussy onaholes, each representing three a woman of a different age, and one, apparently ageless, asshole.

The Setsugekka predates the 3fap by six years.

See Also: What’s an onahole?

The Biological Drives Behind Some Holiday Food Traditions

Yesterday, my man and I celebrated Steak & BJ Day ~ with a few modifications. We do not really celebrate Valentine’s Day. (I am, after all, a “curvy man.”) Our Steak & BJ Day rather combines the two holidays, perhaps… It begins with me going down on him, pleasuring him orally, as foreplay before the big event ~ which, yes, is vaginal sex. After that, we eat steak. Simple? Yes. Delightful? Absolutely.

And it’s not necessarily reserved for March 14th, either.

But this whole idea of food and holidays has me thinking of a recent study.

This study showed that when women found themselves with an attractive male, they opted for healthy foods ~ yet men exposed to an attractive woman opted for expensive drinking and dining options.

This does not surprise me one bit. (Not many of these sex or attraction studies do, frankly.)

It makes absolute sense to me that women faced with a potential attractive male mate would be thinking about their health. And not because I believe that women are trying to “be skinny” or otherwise trying to conform to media portrayals of female bodies [insert rant here]. Such conclusions are tedious. Not to mention that making such an assumption is a big leap; “healthy” doesn’t equate “skinniness.” Let’s stick with the notion of health, shall we.

Most of the things we consider to be signs of female beauty are actually flags for fertility. It’s only natural ~ part of our species biological imperative ~ for women to be considering their health when presented with a potential mate.

Similarly, men, who have identified a genetic beauty worthy of insemination would be interested in showcasing their status as excellent providers ~ a la sparing no expense in providing a large display of food and drink.

Again, you can call it sexist, but there’s science and biological drives behind it all.

So is it any wonder then, that women would want men to display their monetary protector/provider status from time to time ~ including honoring anniversaries and “made up Hallmark holidays” like Valentine’s Day?

Here’s a tip, menfolk: If you want her to be more sexually available, try showing her what a big providing man you are. It could be food or chocolates; it could be jewelry. It could be a car. But gifts are always good. Even if Especially if it’s not even a holiday.

 

Satisfying Women Sexually May Be Complicated, But It Creates Male Superheros

Every once and awhile, sex studies align like planets to produce a clear sign. This week, it’s all about female orgasms. Hip-hip-whore-ay!

The first study to hit my news-feed was from the Indiana University, Chapman University, and Claremont Graduate University which announced that straight women have fewest orgasms. If you are a straight woman, this likely does not surprise you.

The fact that lesbian women orgasmed more often than heterosexual women indicates that many heterosexual women could experience higher rates of orgasm.

Which is a really nice way of saying that men are not always the best lovers. Again, if you are a straight woman this likely doesn’t surprise you.

The second bit I found in my news-feed may help: Apparently There are 12 Female Orgasms:

Cliteral Orgasm
Vaginal/G-Spot Orgasm
Blended Orgasm
Multiple Orgasms
Anal Orgasm
Sleep-Gasm (a.k.a ‘Snore-gasm’)
Cervical Orgasm
U-Spot Orgasm
A-Spot Orgasm
Nipple Orgasm
Core-Gasm
Expanded Sexual Response

It’s not just the use of the word “apparently” which indicates the number and variation of female orgasms is news to many ~ but the reactions to it.

Reactions from too many women and men was astonishment. Many men rather blew off the notion with snide little comments about how complicated female sexuality is. Your ignorance is showing, gents! (You can hide it in jokes, gents, but we still know your ignorance ~ and even resentment is there!) And while it would be really easy for me to dive down that rabbit hole of male ignorance, I won’t. Not so much because I am nice (You likely know better! *wink*), but because if I get caught up in such talk, heterosexual women will continue to be less satisfied in bed. And I can’t stand that idea! So, I will avoid that rabbit hole of male shame and get down to the business of making women’s holes happier.

However, it seems that male ego may just be the key here to women’s happiness!

Research suggests that women’s orgasms may function as a masculinity achievement for men. Yup, you read that right; hetrosexual men feel better about themselves when they can make women come. As clinical psychologist & sex therapist Dr. David J. Ley noted in a tweet, getting a woman to orgasm makes a man feel like a superhero.

To all the men out there who feel confused and down-right confounded on how to pleasure a woman ~ let alone in a dozen ways ~ take this apparently surprising news and turn it into a challenge. Learn how to please a woman ~ and earn that superhero cape!

It’s not just you, your ego, and your dick which will grow with pride either. You and your partner will grow closer, and the amount of sex you have will also grow. It really is a win-win.

Need some help? Some sex ed tips to help you improve your lady’s sex life? Dick Dojo has an entire video series on the subject ~ and, from now through March 12, 2017, their Bedroom Black Belt Series of ebooks are free!

The course covers everything from cock control (so you don’t experience premature ejaculation) to making the most of your mouth and hands. It’s Kung Fu for your cock ~ and sure to help you feel like a sexual superhero. But you may have to put the cape on by yourself; if you’ve earned it, she’ll be too tired to help. *wink*

Tale As Old As Time? Beauty & The Beast Buzz

Pop Sugar thought they were clever posting about a Beauty & The Beast inspired dildo. Maybe they were; I mean, why not capitalize on the new buzz surrounding Disney’s live action remake of Beauty & The Beast. Even if most of that buzz surrounds the upset over an openly gay character (Hey, at least it’s not Lumière, as a “flaming” candle.) instead of the teenage-buffalo romance:

Why let the fact that the rosebud-tipped glass dildo (which clearly stays away from anything remotely related to the fairy tale or “Belle”) has been around for quite awhile stop you either.

However, why point to the most expensive purchasing option for the toy? Not only is the Prisms Budding Rose Shaped Glass Dildo cheaper on Amazon ~ nearly half the price ~ but it ships free with Prime, and that means you’re not waiting the two weeks the other shop notes for shipping.

There are other glass rose sex toy options as well. But if the whole point was to capitalize on “the buzz,” why not go with a rose vibrator?

Even Robots Need To Revive Their Careers With Sexy B Flicks

From the biography of Elektro, the world’s first celebrity robot who wowed the crowds at the 1939 New York World’s Fair, comes this sad and all-too-familiar chapter of the fleetingness of fame:

One curious part of the story is that Elektro tried the classic B-list celebrity tactic of using sex to revive a flagging career – appearing in a proto soft porn film in the 1960s.

The movie was entitled Sex Kittens Go to College, and you can see Elektro featured in the trailer.

Here’s the film’s trailer:

Catch Elektro as “Thinko”, Mamie Van Doren, and the whole gang in the flick.

Flashback Friday: Eek! He’ll See Me Nude!

Circa 2004, comes this bit of body image sex positivity

I don’t know what all the fuss is about, kids, but lately Gracie has received some emails from women ~ frantic women who are worried about how they look in bed to their partners.

Read it for what’s more likely to be going on in your partner’s head than your fears.

Warning: Choke Hazard!

Despite the lifelike appearance, ethereal beauty, and being “endowed with soul”…

This doll, with the perfectly molded internal structure of vagina, is not for children under 3 years old.

WARNING:
CHOKING HAZARD
Small parts. Not for children under 3 yrs.

Yes, it’s the small parts which make this sex doll inappropriate for children…

Good Parenting

Vanessa Fuchs, proprietress of adult store Sassy Sensations, shares a story:

Fifteen years ago, a visibly uncomfortable woman came into one of her stores looking for help. But she wasn’t there for herself; she was looking for a sex toy for her daughter that would allow her to experiment with her sexuality in a safe way.

“To tell you the truth, I had tears in my eyes. The other customers who were walking around and overheard, had tears in their eyes,” says Fuchs. “I said, ‘You’re amazing. I admire that you don’t feel comfortable in a store like this, and yet you came for the benefit of your daughter.’”

Now that’s sex positive parenting.

Throwback Thursday: Controlling Parts Is Controlling The Sum Of Its Parts

Controlling Parts Is Controlling The Sum Of Its Parts was published here on SK on 08/27/2008; sadly, it is still relevant.

Snippet:

When bodies & their parts are controlled, we diminish not only autonomy in the physical and legal sense, but the constraints send the message to all that those beings those bodies & parts belong to are not free & equal beings.