Today we welcome a guest into our Sex Kitten Parlor to discuss his personal story… Peter is a relationship & sex writer for TheGayUk magazine. He is in a loving marriage with Michael; the couple resides in Brisbane, Australia. Besides writing, Peter loves cooking, reading, and travelling around exotic destinations. His future plans revolve around starting up his personal couple counseling business.
A long time ago, in a land far far away there lived a Prince. He was charming, handsome, smart and rich – a real catch. Then, one day – he went to a ball in search of his soul mate. That’s when he instantly fell in love with a Princess, the most beautiful of all. Their eyes met and it was love that would last forever and ever… at least, that’s what we are told. Truth is, this glorified Prince had probably had another prince on the side already, the Princess had probably had an elf or another princess to fool around with too, but Disney never told us about that, did he now? Sure, it’s always easier to live an illusion than face reality. Until it slaps you in the face.
We all love and fall, we all hurt. It’s how we overcome it, and how strongly we decide to love again what counts.
Discovering your partner is something you never thought would be absolutely nerve-wrecking. From small things, like realizing they’ve been lying to you the whole time when saying they went golfing with their friends (when they’ve actually been taking a break from the family life every Wednesday and Friday) to realizing your significant other has preferences towards the other sex. Naturally, these two are incomparable but it’s all betrayal and betrayal is difficult on plenty of levels. Finding out your partner is bisexual? Horrible.
When it happened to me and my husband I was destroyed; a mashup of feelings I’d never felt until then suffocated me to a point I felt like I couldn’t breathe. It was the worst feeling of my life, in all honesty. And the way I found out? Not that pleasant either.
We were at this party our friends threw (it’s their thing, they throw it every last Saturday in a month and all of our friends gather, we bring home-cooked food and deserts, bottles of wine are opened and we just enjoy our night away) and my husband started chatting with this girl, who was quite attractive, I must admit. She was new in the crowd, recently moved in next door to our friends’, so they invited her over. At first, I thought they were just being friendly, but once the leaning in started and his flirting I knew something was up. But, I was confused as she was, well, a girl and he was-gay. That is, was supposed to be gay. I started recalling all the small signs from before, I so successfully (and intentionally) ignored but did bury deep into my subconsciousness thinking they’d be safe there.
When we came home, I immediately confronted him. At first, he started denying it but then he cracked. He started crying, I could read the immense pain in his body language for hurting me and the inexplicable relief at the same time, for getting it off his chest. So he admitted he is bisexual and what was I supposed to do with that? Was our 7-year-long marriage a lie? Did he ever love me? Was I a decoy for something, God knows what? I was frozen with shock yet a burning flame in my mind and soul.
The morning after – I left the house and called in sick. I needed some time away and a proper detachment to clear my head (read: sleep or cry when I am awake, then drink and exercise my strength not to call him when all I wanted was to scream his name and tell him how much I despise him and love him still).
After I’ve managed to put together a few days without calling him, I’ve decided it’s time I picked myself up and figured out what was happening to me. To us. At the time, it was all so confusing, so mind boggling that it seemed like there was no way out. I wasn’t ready to let go, I’ve spent some of the best years of my life with this man. I’ve given him my soul, my body, my mind… I’ve surrendered my entire being to him and to me – that was more than enough a reason to try and fight this.
However, there was no one to talk to. I felt humiliated and pretty much in a dead-end. I mean, who could have I turned to and hope they would help? Nobody could understand what I was feeling.
The only thing that came to my mind was to try and Google it, see if there were any studies on this done, read through what the experts had to say. And, to my surprise, once I started Googling it, it turned out it was a rather common problem plenty a couple was dealing with. Not that I would ever want such a heartache on anyone but when I realized there were other couples in the same or similar jam as I was, I felt a relief. Not a relief because they were suffering, but because it meant I’d be able to find a solution for my situation. Who knew being bisexual hit so many marriages!
I knew I didn’t want to leave him but I was aware there will be something for him to stay happy and content. Something absolutely out of the box.
After reading articles and articles of people with similar experiences to mine, I’ve stumbled upon a reference that lead me to a company called Red Door escort agency which, I’d later find out, was a highly professional and trustworthy environment offering the best escort service and utmost pleasure. Apparently, it was highly ranked with so many couples trusting it for support and a solution. So I thought, I’ll go check it out, what’s the worst that could happen!
I’ve arranged the meeting thinking the sooner I get it over with, the better. On my way there, I was sweating, my brain was pulsating, my mouth was dry and I genuinely felt sick to my stomach with the whole situation I was going through. Was I really not enough?
Nonetheless, once I got there, a sense of calm overwhelmed me. I was blown away with professionalism and amicability of the people who welcomed me. Contrary to my expectations (I’d honestly expected a Red District situation), the atmosphere was warm and cozy, a dignified ambiance followed by an expert approach – what more could I ask for! I talked about my problem, and I immediately got several potential solutions with explanations on how things could go down. This immediately instilled me with confidence. I was on a meeting with people who knew what they were talking about and I loved it.
Well, does it mean we’re cheating on each other if we opt for your services? – I asked at some point.
Honey – she smiled – would you rather have the love of your life unhappy with his limitation to be who he is, embrace it entirely and then snap somewhere and cheat with some random person in a bar, only to then come home to you ashamed and disgusted with himself, or would you rather go on the ride together, fully supporting each other? To be blunt – no, you are not cheating. You are loving each other by doing this.
I was sold.
I left the Red Door and immediately called Michael. It was a mind-opening experience for me. I am ready to try and work it out and I may have found us a solution. When I went back home, I told him all about it. He was a bit skeptical and, to a point, we were both afraid it would break our marriage apart but I guess, it was only normal to be as overwhelmed as we were.
When we went there together at our first session, it was like the most thrilling threesome you could have ever imagined. I was given the option to watch and I did. I was in the room there with them, the girl he was with was super hot and looking at him desirably. Being wanted by that gorgeous woman, seeing him happy was immensely uplifting and stimulating for me! I was convinced there was nothing to be intimidated by. Other sessions, he went alone and later came home to me.
Risking it paid off and, guess what? We’re celebrating our 8th anniversary tomorrow, he is taking me dancing!