Saucy Saturday: Saturday Morning Filmation Lust Edition

Are you old enough to remember the classic live-action Saturday morning Filmation Associates television shows? If so, you no doubt recall the lovely JoAnna Cameron of The Secrets Of Isis. What an icon of female power ~ and lust! Now you can, as Storybook Whorehouse says, “get this vintage comic & stay up late at night reading with a flashlight under the covers — and wanking with a Fleshlight.”

vintage isis comic

Of course, ladies lusted after Isis too… So consider this a great Halloween or cosplay idea ~ and feel free to use the sex toy of your choice. *wink*

Via Storybook Whorehouse who has lots of other Saturday Morning Cartoon Porn.

See also: The Secret of Isis: JoAnna Cameron.

JoAnna Cameron as Isis vintage retro graphic novel comic

Billion Dollar Babies Flashback

I’m not a super duper Alice Cooper fan, but every time I hear Billion Dollar Babies, a big old grin spreads across my face… Thankfully, today’s sex dolls are better now. They aren’t slicker than a weasel (unless that’s a good thing?) and their heads do, generally, stay on. But like Alice said, they are worth far more.

Billion dollar baby
Rubber little lady, slicker than a weasel
Grimy as an alley
Loves me like no other lover
Billion dollar baby
Rubber little monster, baby, I adore you
Man or woman living couldn’t love me like you, baby

We go dancing nightly in the attic
While the moon is rising in the sky
If I’m too rough, tell me
I’m so scared your little head will come off in my hands

Billion dollar baby
I got you in the dime store
No other little girl could ever hold you
Any tighter, any tighter than me, bay
Billion dollar baby
Reckless like a gambler, million dollar maybe
Foaming like a dog that’s been infected by the rabies

We go dancing nightly in the attic
While the moon is rising the sky
If I’m too rough, tell me
I’m so scared your little head will come off in my hands
Million dollar baby
Billion dollar bay
Trillion dollar baby
Zillion dollar baby

Sunday Funnies: Keep Getting’ It Up Edition (Or, The Condom Vs Dildo Debate)

At first glance, this retro ceramic mug with Japanese art design may not look like much…

Vintage 1970's NAUGHTY risqué Japanese Stoneware sex tea cup DOUBLE ENTENDRE cheeky sexy souvenir humorous erotic gift

Until you turn it around a bit and spy that interesting object there…

retro 1970's Japanese DOUBLE ENTENDRE condom or dildo with cum cup

While the seller sees the object as a used condom, with a white swish of semen; I spy, with my tiny little eye, a blue dildo and its just milked rewards. …I would insert a Confucius joke here ~ butt but Confucius was Chinese, not Japanese.

The seller translates the Japanese text on this sexual vintage stoneware mug as follows:

The text on the cup reads, “八起 人生 おもしろき” or “Hakki jinsei omoshiroki” which is translated as, “Get up eight times, life is interesting.” It is in reference to the adage, “Fall seven times, get up eight.” Though the meaning is probably closer to, “Life with ups and downs is interesting.”

Thanks, but, regardless of whether it’s a dildo or a condom, I think we get the meaning. No matter how many times that dick goes down, it’s better to get it back up.

(I still say it’s a dildo. “Bottoms up, retro 70’s cup!”)

Saucy Saturday: Soapy Vanessa del Rio Edition

At the risk of exposing too much Vanessa del Rio here (as if that could even be a bad thing!) today’s Saucy Saturday is a very soapy, very ravishing, del Rio. You can get your signed copy here.

soapy vanessa del rio

Sunday Funnies: Vintage Highball Cocktail Coasters Edition

Vintage barware alert: “Intimate Coasters Duets for your Highballs” for him & her…

Intimate Coasters Duets for your Highballs

A pair of coasters for men, another pair for women; circa 1950s:

“His” coasters feature a jockstrap design. (To prevent your highballs from having low balls? lol) “Hers” feature a lingerie and garters design. The intimate apparel pieces dress your cocktail and beverage glasses, the fabric absorbing the sweat on the glasses and keeping it from marking your furniture. Classy hosts and hostesses use these kitschy coasters so that they don’t get those tacky rings on the furniture — and start plenty of conversations!

Naughty & risque at the time, the set contains two pairs (four coasters total). Make your next couples night even more of a hoot! Great for bachelor and bachelorette parties!

“Freshen up drinks with Duets the gay party coasters”.

Vintage Highball Cocktail Coaster Garters Hers

Vintage Highball Jock Cocktail Coasters For Him

Saucy Saturday: Slumber Party Dreams Edition

A Slip Of A Girl shared these vintage finds — and waxed poetic about the slumber party fantasies babydoll nighties evoke… Pillow fights, as always, remain optional. Images of Sara from of The Dream Merchants II (where the vintage nighties are for sale).

vintage vermillion vanity fair nightie primrose vintage chiffon babydoll by Max Shwartz for Beau Monde

50 Years of Slightly Slutty Behavior ~ Almost Gone!

I was looking at more vintage Vanessa del Rio and in her auctions she has listed the over-sized, coffee-table book & DVD set, 50 Years of Slightly Slutty Behavior, listed. Not only is it an awesome biography of the classic porn star, but it has plenty of visual stimulation too. Plus, del Rio will personally sign it for you. (Note the cool lenticular insert!) I’ve been watching for days now, and it is listed as temporarily out of stock at Amazon ~ but I think it is a permanent situation as this was published as a Limited Edition by Taschen in 2010. Even more reason to get it now and get it from del Rio herself.

vanessa del rio collectors book

limited edition title page vanessa del rio

vanessa del rio 50 years Slightly Slutty Behavior book and dvd

vanessa del rio 50 years set

taschen's Slightly Slutty Behavior limited edition

vanessa del rio porn star book

Here’s Looking At You, Vanessa del Rio

If you’re a fan of Vanessa del Rio and her films, you should know that the legend is auctioning off memorabilia from her fabulous career. (She will personally autograph the items for the buyers as well.) Here are but a few of the fab finds currently available. (Before you get lost in looking, note the following: More on Vanessa here. And, hey, Vanessa del Rio has an active Twitter account!) Tip via A Slip Of A Girl.

classy vanessa del rio in fur

vintage classic vanessa del rio in panties

classic porn poster girls usa vanessa del rio samantha fox

peek a boo vanessa del rio nylons

vanessa del rio art by steve harris

steve harris art vanessa del rio nude in stockings

vanessa del rio in bondage stockings boots

busty vanessa del rio corset stockings nude

Beauty Is Skin Deep… (An Ugly History Lesson)

According to this vintage WWII propaganda poster, beauty is but a mask covering hideous venereal disease.

WWII venereal disease propaganda poster

Because I’ve written a lot this week, here’s a quick, link-laden, bullet point list of things I was reminded of when I saw this poster:

* Primarily, what we call “beautiful” (symmetry, clear skin, long hair, etc.) is rather an attraction to key health indicators. While STDs can exist & be transmitted before “ugliness” occurs (especially in women because the symptoms are often less visible ~ hence one of Eddie Murphy’s controversial AIDS jokes in 1983 “What’s next, I guess you just put your dick in it and explodes!”), if a woman’s STI had done this much damage, a mask wouldn’t help.

* As today, women were largely blamed for STDs during WWII ~ including by the military. The more beautiful you were, the more promiscuous you were assumed to be ~ and therefore the more disease you hid behind your mask. (You can change “were” to “are” for today’s slut-shaming, women-blaming culture.)

* Because being gay was a mental illness back then, the US government didn’t believe it had gay soldiers to worry about. If & when they magically appeared, they were easily, umm, discharged by reason of mental defect. This is yet another reason women were blamed for the spread of VD. But, gay or not, in WWII or not, men do have sex with other men.

All that aside…

This poster begs the question: If she agrees to keep her mask on, will you, dear soldier, keep your condom on?

Vintage poster, for sale here, found via DPopTart, here.

PS If you want to be grossed out by STI history, read this.

“Dip In Water & Watch Me Swell”

Oh, lordy, I am actually old enough to remember seeing these classic PBR bar sponges at taverns when I was growing up! (Hey, back then, it was normal for parents to bring their kids to taverns ~ there were always families there at pig roasts, corn roasts, etc.) Just like my man, CR/LF, the Super Cool Blue Pabst Man would swell in water. The difference is, when soap is added, the Cool Blue Pabst sponge would clean up; whereas my man prefers to get dirty. *wink*

cool blue superman of Pabst Blue Ribbon Beer vintage barware sponge