Satisfying Women Sexually May Be Complicated, But It Creates Male Superheros

Every once and awhile, sex studies align like planets to produce a clear sign. This week, it’s all about female orgasms. Hip-hip-whore-ay!

The first study to hit my news-feed was from the Indiana University, Chapman University, and Claremont Graduate University which announced that straight women have fewest orgasms. If you are a straight woman, this likely does not surprise you.

The fact that lesbian women orgasmed more often than heterosexual women indicates that many heterosexual women could experience higher rates of orgasm.

Which is a really nice way of saying that men are not always the best lovers. Again, if you are a straight woman this likely doesn’t surprise you.

The second bit I found in my news-feed may help: Apparently There are 12 Female Orgasms:

Cliteral Orgasm
Vaginal/G-Spot Orgasm
Blended Orgasm
Multiple Orgasms
Anal Orgasm
Sleep-Gasm (a.k.a ‘Snore-gasm’)
Cervical Orgasm
U-Spot Orgasm
A-Spot Orgasm
Nipple Orgasm
Core-Gasm
Expanded Sexual Response

It’s not just the use of the word “apparently” which indicates the number and variation of female orgasms is news to many ~ but the reactions to it.

Reactions from too many women and men was astonishment. Many men rather blew off the notion with snide little comments about how complicated female sexuality is. Your ignorance is showing, gents! (You can hide it in jokes, gents, but we still know your ignorance ~ and even resentment is there!) And while it would be really easy for me to dive down that rabbit hole of male ignorance, I won’t. Not so much because I am nice (You likely know better! *wink*), but because if I get caught up in such talk, heterosexual women will continue to be less satisfied in bed. And I can’t stand that idea! So, I will avoid that rabbit hole of male shame and get down to the business of making women’s holes happier.

However, it seems that male ego may just be the key here to women’s happiness!

Research suggests that women’s orgasms may function as a masculinity achievement for men. Yup, you read that right; hetrosexual men feel better about themselves when they can make women come. As clinical psychologist & sex therapist Dr. David J. Ley noted in a tweet, getting a woman to orgasm makes a man feel like a superhero.

To all the men out there who feel confused and down-right confounded on how to pleasure a woman ~ let alone in a dozen ways ~ take this apparently surprising news and turn it into a challenge. Learn how to please a woman ~ and earn that superhero cape!

It’s not just you, your ego, and your dick which will grow with pride either. You and your partner will grow closer, and the amount of sex you have will also grow. It really is a win-win.

Need some help? Some sex ed tips to help you improve your lady’s sex life? Dick Dojo has an entire video series on the subject ~ and, from now through March 12, 2017, their Bedroom Black Belt Series of ebooks are free!

The course covers everything from cock control (so you don’t experience premature ejaculation) to making the most of your mouth and hands. It’s Kung Fu for your cock ~ and sure to help you feel like a sexual superhero. But you may have to put the cape on by yourself; if you’ve earned it, she’ll be too tired to help. *wink*

Traveling With Kids This Holiday? Be Prepared! (Or, It Doesn’t Matter What Gender Your Kids Are, You Should Be Present)

Since we’re always trying to make your life better, here’s another classic holiday helpful from Sex Kitten.

This tip is a great reminder to prepare yourself for what can happen during holiday travel. It doesn’t matter if you are flying across the country, just driving ten minutes, or if you are going over the river & through the woods to grandmother’s house; if you have kids along, be prepared from unexpected, perhaps even unseemly questions. Don’t take my word for it; look what happened to Bryanne Salazar:

My sons and I were in the car driving home from Target, when my oldest, then 12, asked, “Hey mom, do girls actually have orgasms?”

Thankfully, Salazar was alone with her boys in a car; this sort of question cause additional discomfort on a fully packed 747 when your worries include being overheard by everyone from sexually frustrated frequent fliers, prudes, and parents who are protective of their own youngster’s sex education.

girls-orgasmsAs with most parenting issues, it is easy to say “be prepared for the unexpected” ~ less easy to know how to be prepared for what you are not expecting. However, in this case, Salazar would have been better prepared ~ or even avoided this whole situation ~ if she has simply been present for the sex ed conversation her husband had had with her kids. But she ducked out of that one, playing the gender card, believing men should teach boys about sex.

Salazar doesn’t mention how old her boys were; but I’m of the opinion that if boys are ready to hear about male orgasms, including how to clean up after one, they ought to be told about female orgasms. And vice versa.

Sure, female orgasms are a lot more complicated, which adds to the length of the sex talk. But perhaps if all children learned about female orgasms, those orgasms could be a lot less complicated. And achieved more often.

Image Credits: Lefteris Heretakis.

Gay Men Like Different Things

To some extent the erotica for gay men does work for straight women. Even the size of his cock is a fantasy for some. (Fantasy, not reality). This image goes beyond my style. Beyond anything I think practical or possible without the addition of shaving cream or some other illusion to make it look like a human male could ejaculate that much. It must be a male fantasy, not just gay men. So that was interesting today. I never know what interesting ideas I will find here and there.
Source: Jotto – Juicy dealings | www.gaycamp.net

Those 70s Feet Tell A Sex Story

I was reading about those 1970s sex feet and did some searching of my own. I found this vintage men’s handkerchief, which is bomb-tasticly awesome in its comic book panel-esque sex storyline, done nearly entirely with bare feet. There’s the electric moment when their feet touch ~ and you can feel the “Wanna?” eyebrow wiggles. Then the mount, the action… But what’s up with that one just before the big finis? Presumably her legs go up, he really gets going ~ and goes off like a gunshot! (It looked like a gunshot to the anus to me at first… Still kinda does.) True to what Epiphora & Stoya have been talking about, male ejaculation is the climax that matters in storytelling. No mention or depiction of the lady’s orgasm. I guess that’s why in that last panel only one person looks like they are satisfied enough to roll over and sleep.

Vintage Mens Risqué foot sex Handkerchief

Ahchoo! Spring Has Nearly Sprung… So Have The Boners

Spring may remind you of the birds and bees, but what makes the world go ’round is the pollen itself. Well, the plant-sperm filled pollen getting deep enough inside the female floral genitalia bits to reach the stigma. Bees, of course, help. So does the wind. But in any case, that pollen (and other bits in the air) create that joyous thing we call seasonal spring allergies. For some, calling it “joyous” it sarcasm or even cruelty. Ahchoo Ahhh, but for others, well, this is the sexiest season of all. I am speaking of those with a sneezing fetish, of course.

sneezeWhether a person delights in their own sneezing or the sneezes of others, Spring brings so many delights…

It might be the sight, the sound, and, yes, even the dainty damp-mist touch of a sneeze that is arousing… It might be that breathy build up followed by such a violent and uncontrollable release. Perhaps all of the above. (I’ve even heard from a number of men how they like the idea of a girl sneezing and peeing her panties a bit!)

Experts remain varied in their responses to sneeze fetishes.

Some have never heard of such a thing. One one hand, it is not so remarkable when you consider such a mild-mannered (yet possibly rude, should a person not employ a handkerchief) fetish is likely to drive a person to seek help. On the other hand, why do you think folks were so into snuff back in the day?

sneezing sexy lacie pso videoOthers feel the fetish is simply a matter of a sneeze being physically and psychologically so in parallel with an orgasm. Others believe it’s a matter of one having sneezed or heard a sneeze while masturbating during those critical formative years. Still others believe that, like virtually any other fetish, it’s just too individual and complex to really be traced to any source.

In the end, does it matter? If I had a sneeze fetish, I’d be ecstatic that I literally had such cheap thrills!

If “Gesundheit!” brings you or someone you love closer to God, you may wish to check out the Sneeze Fetish Forum. And should you be so unlucky as to be without a person muddling through allergies this season, phone sex operator & camgirl Sexy Lacie is standing by.

sexy lacie sneezing on friends breastsShould she be sneezing for another, don’t worry ~ she has a number of recorded sneeze audios for you to enjoy. She even has videos! (Sneezing on her friend’s tits video?!)

Sorry, I haven’t found a man selling such things… Too bad. I bet that income is nothing to sneeze at. *wink*

Images via Sexy Lacie.

Hot Flash Fiction Friday: When I Pull the Zipper Over Your Eyes

maskI pull the bondage hood on over your face. I zip it over your eyes. You keep them open to the last moment because that’s what I like – seeing your last look in the light before I turn your world dark.

Your breath becomes raspy. You never like the first few minutes in the hood.

I know you don’t like the smell of the hood. But, you stop thinking about the smell soon.

There you sit, waiting, expecting. I don’t do anything for awhile. I enjoy your anticipation. I like to wait for your squirming to start. Just waiting, thinking about what I will do next, what I’ve got planned or will get the impulse to do… it makes you eager and hard.

Silent and sitting right in front of you I notice the little things. You’re restless. First your hands sit on your thighs then rub up and down, caressing yourself. I like it. I cover one of your hands with my own and lead it up your thigh to your rising cock. Your breath whooshes out but the narrow vent leaves you coughing for air.

I keep your hand on your cock, not even moving, just resting our hands on your cock together. When your cock is hard and your hips wriggle and squirm your breathing is fast and gasping. Still I wait, holding you in position until your cock starts leaking.

That’s when your mumbling starts, begging through the zipper of the bondage hood. My real fun starts then. How long can I keep you right there… needing but not getting anything. How long can I stretch out your building need to orgasm.

A guide to decoding shitty articles about the G-spot’s existence

Look beyond the clickbaity headlines and lazy reporting. The latest “study” does not “prove” anything new about the G-spot. The G-spot is alive and well.

Source: www.heyepiphora.com

Amen.

See on Scoop.itLet’s Get Sex Positive

Exclusive Kaylee Pond Interview Part Four: What Women Want To Know About Being A CamGirl

We’ve been talking with the lovely 26 year-old webcam model, and self proclaimed geek, Kaylee Pond. In this last part (yes, I know; it’s sad to see it end!), Kaylee answers some more personal questions ~ the sort many of (but not only) our female readers are likely interested in.

Kaylee, as you know, there’s a fierce secondwave of feminist backlash. Many women won’t use the “F word” and many feminists are anti-sex work, resulting in even more fracturing. I have to ask: Do you consider yourself a feminist?

sexy geek girl with glasses camgirl kaylee pondAbsolutely! Though I feel it’s really important to avoid misandry and I feel it’s far too common in feminist culture. I talk about body and sexy positivity very actively in my chat as well, and I do my best to discourage any negativity towards those things if they’re brought up.

I must admit that I do like to think that I can spread feminism and positivity with my shows, even if it’s incredibly subtle sometimes.

Lots of people feel like being a camgirl is anti-feminism but that’s just utter bullshit. That’s people who don’t know what feminism really is, especially if it doesn’t look like what they think it should look like. Part of supporting and giving power and equality to women is letting them do whatever the fuck it is that they want.

topless busty redhead kaylee pond stockings panties

Anyway, I’m into feminism and hope that I can open a few people’s eyes to how that can be wonderful at least every once in a while.

Besides me, do you have female fans? In general, are there women who watch cam girls?

Yes, absolutely! I have at least one awesome lady who is a regular in my room and I really adore the idea of women watching my shows too! Whether it be for the fun and companionship, or for the sexy side of things. I think that there can sometimes be this idea that camming is all “for the entertainment of men” and I love the idea of making a place that is open and safe and comfortable and FUN for all adults of any gender or sexual preference.

shiny geeky camgirl kaylee pondSome female viewers let everyone know that they’re women, and others are either purposefully quiet about it or prefer to remain ambiguous, so I might have more female viewers than I realize…

The cam model community is also REALLY strong (at least a portion of us, for sure) and we often visit each other on “perv” accounts to support each other and say “Hi!”. Personally, I LOVE supporting other models and hanging out with them when they’re online and it’s great when they visit me, too! Sometimes you don’t know if they’re visiting though because most have names that are fairly inconspicuous. It is definitely considered the more polite way to visit other models — because it’s always important that you never ever take attention away from a model’s show. I really do love that aspect of the community though, it’s great to show support to one another and it helps us all stay connected!

Aside from the fun and money, what have you gained from camming? Have you learned anything about yourself, your sexuality…

Wow, what a great question! I would say that I’ve gained an immense amount from camming!

In addition to lots of cool skills like community management, some coding, making graphics, marketing, etc I’ve grown a lot as a person. The change was almost immediate.

geeky sexy confident feminist camgirl kaylee pond I started camming and became more confident in every other aspect of my life.

I would go in to work at my shitty customer service job and people would sometimes treat me just terribly. (You can tell that so many people just treat service workers like slime all through their lives wherever they go and they are allowed to do it because people just don’t want to have to deal with it. I have never been treated anywhere near as abhorrently while camming as I was when working customer service). Before I started camming, I would kind of just deal with it and let the shitty comments go — unless it was something I actually had to take care of in my job. Right away, after I started camming, someone would sexually harass me or be lame and I would just straight-up call them out on it! It felt great!

confident sexy busty geeky nerd camgirl kaylee pond

But camming is not only a huge confidence boost, you also have to assert yourself. As a camgirl, you are managing and running your chat room; it’s your responsibility to deal with jerks and trolls. Anyone who sucks can just be kicked out — but you have to do it. So now, when I run into assholes in my life, it feels natural to put them in their place. I don’t run around yelling at people, but when it’s important I can stand up for myself and others.

I’ve learned all kinds of things from camming. I’ve learned how to be more patient, more accepting, more understanding, more flexible, more EVERYTHING! Probably one of the best things though is actually just how completely wonderful people can be. I think I’ve become a better person and a better friend since I became a camgirl.

sexy nerd camgirl kaylee pond in spider-man panties

As far as sexually, I can definitely say I’ve learned quite a bit there! I am one of the many women who has an extraordinarily difficult time having an orgasm. I was saddened for many years because no matter what, I just could not seem to have one. I couldn’t be like all of those woman I saw in movies just getting it on and having awesome orgasms each time, no sweat.

kaylee pond burlesque lingerie camgirlI read up on it, I tried all kinds of things, my sexual partners each professed that they would, of course, be the one to finally make it happen with no real luck. It wasn’t anyone’s fault, but my body just wasn’t responding. I enjoyed myself immensely and loved sex, but just never got that prize at the bottom of the box.

As you can imagine, this was a huge source of concern for me when I started camming because I wasn’t sure if I could be as successful without having orgasms in my shows. But fortunately camming was the push I needed to do MORE research and, most importantly, to find out what toys people were using to have orgasms. After a bit of research on the camming forum I frequent and watching other models on MFC, I found that there was quite a favorite in the orgasm department so I decided it was a completely necessary start-up purchase. Enter the Hitachi Magic Wand, my dear sweet “personal massager”. I tried using it shortly after I started camming and OMG, I fucking finally had my first real orgasm! Everything changed!

camgirl kaylee pond is an orgasmic hitachi girlIt totally changed everything. Now I have a much larger toy collection and through camming I’ve been able to learn all of the best ways to enjoy them and have spectacular orgasms all of the time.

I thought I was going to live my whole life without one and now I get them all the time — it’s fucking awesome!

So now I know that for orgasms to happen, I just need an inhuman level of clitoral stimulation; but fortunately there are toys to do that job.

kaylee pond tushy pantiesI’ve been able to enjoy all sorts of other fun sexual things since I started camming. The art of teasing being one of my very favorite things.

But I’ve also been able to enjoy all kinds of other interesting sexual things that I‘d only ever delved into a little before (wax, ice, bondage, etc.). It’s really opened up a whole new world for me and I’m so grateful!

While this is officially the end of my chat with the divine Ms. Kaylee, never fear! I will find invent another reason to bring the sweet object of my affections back again… Until then, you can follow her at Twitter and Tumblr, buy her clips here ~ and of course, watch her on cam!

(When you do, tell her Gracie is still swooning over her.)

Faking Orgasms?

Faking orgasms; we’ve all done it.

beautifulagon orgasm faceIt’s not that you don’t like sex, but maybe you’re not that interested in sex right at the moment. Maybe you’d just rather watch your favorite TV show. Maybe you’d rather just go to sleep. Or maybe you are having a good time, but you don’t want to go “all the way” and have a real orgasm. Some women, like our dearly beloved and now departed Jewel, have medical reasons for avoiding orgasms; the very muscles and nerves that supply moments of intense pleasures also affect muscles and nerves which give you pain in the days that follow.

Whatever the reason, sometimes it’s just easier (and takes less time) to let him finish than to spend the time (and risk hurting his feelings) than to explain the situation. Faking orgasms may not be ideal; but it is a reality.

We can’t in good faith say, “Stop faking orgasms.” Yet there are repercussions for faking your pleasure.

Certainly, faking pleasure can deny yourself actual pleasure. And by faking orgasms to please a partner, you may be avoiding communicating to your partner what you do like and would actually orgasm from; that doesn’t serve you well. You may be hurting yourself, your partners, and your relationships by denying your partners the satisfaction of providing real orgasms. Yes, there are men who genuinely do care about your pleasure and take great pride in being skillful lovers. (Some mensches even use your clues to orgasm with you, or after you!)

Beyond that, your fake orgasms are conditioning your partners to work for specific signs as clues to a job well done. Often this results in you having to repeat your fake orgasm performances. Elizabeth Donaldson illustrates with a story about a friend of hers who “who made a terrible, life-changing mistake” one night:

She and her partner had been at it for some time when she realised she was missing a rather vital episode of Game of Thrones. Her partner was not really in a position to change tack.

He was hammering away at it, determined to ride her over the horizon to a new place of coital bliss. He had really pulled out all the stops from focused foreplay to cunnilingus; he had not taken a single short cut.

An effort like that is never disregarded, not even by the most mean-spirited woman. So, motivated by kindness and good manners, she faked an orgasm.

This in itself is not a terrible, life-changing mistake.

Lord no, faking orgasm is a useful, even crucial, element in a woman’s sexual repertoire. No, the mistake was to throw in a spectacular leg spasm for good measure. After all, her partner had gone to so much effort; she felt a little something extra was required. And so their carnal coupling came to a flamboyant end. He was pleased with himself and she got to watch her show.

As humorous as this may sound, the repercussions are not so funny:

You see, she had set a new standard for orgasm that she has to replicate every time they have sex. Even her most genuinely victorious orgasms are now met with disappointment by her partner if she doesn’t do “the leg thing”. Her sex life has turned into carefully orchestrated cabaret. To make matters worse, she’s now married to the man and (if all goes well) is now condemned to a life of faked leg spasms.

Similarly, this sort of orgasm faking (or exaggeration) often has to take place because, especially for women, no two orgasms are alike.

Like snowflakes, female orgasms come in nearly unlimited varieties. And quantities. If you are or know someone who is multi-orgasmic, you know this to be true. One look at her face, and you can see the variations in power, beauty, agony, and nearly every other nuance of pleasure.

beautiful agony

This fact that women have different orgasms is the way out of the faked orgasm game.

Inform your partner that the leg spasm isn’t the only sign of orgasm ~ or even the only sign of a fucking fantastic orgasm. Explaining the various types of orgasms, what they feel like, what causes them, and, yes, what they may result in, is not only informative (and therefore may release you from your purgatory of orgasm faking), but it can be erotic as hell.

Image Credits: Beautiful Agony.

masturbate-to-beautiful-agony-videos-learn-to-come-when-your-partner-does

Of Orgasm Faces & Hysterical Literature

Kaylee Pond does her Hysterical Literature shows on the third Monday of the month.

This is the only time that I do public cum shows, the only other way to see me orgasm is to buy one of my videos or join my fan club, join a group show, or take me private (or spy on a private) so this is an extra special thing.

The way it works:

I ready aloud from the book and it is awesome and fun.

Once we finish the countdowns, I will begin to read while ALSO USING MY HITACHI. I do this “Beautiful Agony” style, which means that the action happens below the view of the camera, so you get the reactions on my face and in my voice (which is hilarious and endlessly entertaining).

I usually try to hold on as long as possible before I can’t stand it anymore and give in to orgasm. I swear to you, a few sessions ago I came RIGHT at the “42” moment and it was the most epic thing ever. My combined time (someone tipped for an extra orgasm), I SHIT YOU NOT, was 42 minutes. Seriously Hysterical Literature shows are magical.

kaylee on cam

According to our calendar, the next Hysterical Literature cam show will be tomorrow, Monday, March 17, 2014, 7-11pm (Eastern). You can find Kaylee on cam here.