Women, Including Feminists, Can & Do Like Rough Sex (We Knew That Already!)

Mashable discovers the reality that feminists can, indeed, like rough sex:

Of the 1,500+ self-described “kinky” women Jennifer Eve Rehor studied in 2011, the majority were found to have participated in “at least one of the following activities for their own sensual or erotic pleasure: physical humiliation, deprivation, punishment (physical), breath play, obedience/training, verbal abuse/humiliation, other forced activities and service-oriented submission/domestic service.” They did so in the role of the receptive or submissive partner.

For the record, the dominant partner(s) needn’t be male in these scenarios. Nor does rough sex necessarily imply penis-vagina intercourse. Feminist women can and do experiment with power structures well beyond male-female play.

Before you dash off and read the post, we’d like to remind you that we have copiously covered this issue for ages. (Besides, isn’t more confounding that a feminist can belong to most any popular religion?!) And we even discussed rape fantasies and actual rape in our discussions. Here are some of the more recent Sex Kitten posts on the subject of feminists & BDSM:

There’s No Such Thing As BDSM Romance? More BDSM Myth-information

Rape Fantasies Are Normal, Even If You’ve Been Raped

Say It With Me Now: “BDSM Is Not Violence”

BDSM, Porn, & Rape

See also, these interviews with feminists on BDSM: Erika Lust and Miss Fussypants.

Oh, and don’t forget our book ~ yes, actual paper! Sex-Kitten.Net Presents The BDSM Issue (2005).

Now go see the article at Mashable: Can you be a feminist and like rough sex? (Yes!)

James Deen’s Alleged Assaults Were Ignored, Laughed Off by Casts and Crews #sexwork #porn #rape

Since Saturday, when porn actress and writer Stoya tweeted that she was raped by porn hero James Deen, four more adult film performers have come out agains

Sourced through Scoop.it from: www.slate.com

Cauterucci’s article gives the most balanced view of the whole James Deen rape story ~ including the debacles facing women in porn and sex work. While the adult industry has a much faster (and positive) response to its stars who rape and abuse than Hollywood and mainstream media do, there are always the following issues of whether or not it is rape if a person is paid or likes rough sex. 


“There is nothing wrong or rape-like about enjoying rough sex and being good at it. There is nothing wrong or suspicious about acting out a consensual rape fantasy. But, as in offscreen/noncommercial sex, the entire validity of porn as an industry hinges on consent. Perversely, that may be one reason why a porn actress might feel compelled to stay silent about these kinds of violations: Women who act in adult films are often portrayed as victims with little agency or know-how, who must resort to a demeaning and dangerous career because they have no other options. Stories like the ones Fires, Lux, Rayne, and Peters tell—important as they are—don’t exactly contradict that myth.

But neither porn nor rough sex subjected these women to sexual assault, and they didn’t turn James Deen into a rapist. The allegations against Deen are full of references to ways porn actresses control their own careers: through lists of acts they won’t perform, lists of people they won’t perform with, and contracts that specify exactly what will happen in a scene. Deviating from the agreed-upon variety, timing, and manner of sex is just as wrong as any other kind of assault. The women who’ve told their horrifying stories about Deen know that. Deen and the bystanders who looked on and laughed did, too.”

Click links for more info on rape & rape fantasies ~ including issues in porn & sex work.

See on Scoop.itSex Work

Hot Flash Fiction Friday: Face Fucking, Masturbation & Forced Orgasm Edition

Pinkie is a real life submissive ~ and a phone sex operator who turns her money over to her Master, Blackie. She’s got a book out via Tit-Elation, and here’s a little excerpt for Hot Flash Fiction Friday. This takes place after Pinkie has served her Master’s Hong Kong business associates by being a face-fuck toy and she was forced to strip and masturbate for the group of men.

Blackie knows me so well, he knew I was close. “Go ahead and come, you little whore; you can squirt for them too yet.”

When he said “squirt,” the room filled with expectant “ahhs” as if they were a crowd at a Fourth of July celebration who had heard the whistles of the finale fireworks launched into the air.

…It seemed like hours, but I know it was only minutes that I lay there panting and screaming, tears running down my face, smearing my makeup and soaking the hotel bedding — while my body jerked and clenched and then finally just trembled while I lay there muttering something about “no more.”

Someone took the Hitachi from my hand and away from my twitching clit. The bodies began to disburse — except for one. The boss appeared at my face and ordered me to open it. “Now you tired whore, I fuck your face and you have no pleasure, no hope, no wishes other than for it to end.”

You can read the rest ~ and a lot more ~ in the ebook, Pinkie and Blackie: Tales of a Phone Sex Submissive.

pinkie book phone sex submissive

The Miss Fussypants S & M Sex Blog Interview

Gracie interviews Miss Fussypants of S & M = Smoke & Mirrors!

S & M = Smoke & Mirrors' - smoke-n-mirrors_tumblrHey, Miss Fussypants, let’s start with the meaning behind the name of your blog.

S & M, one of the earlier names by which BDSM was known, deals with “Sadomasochism”, a compound of “Sadism” and “Masochism” derived from ye olde Marquis de Sade. A sadist is traditionally described as obtaining pleasure and arousal from inflicting or watching the pain of others; a masochist is the person who obtains pleasure and arousal by receiving the pain. And it’s important to note that pain is not just physical pain, but includes the pain of emotional cruelty from degradation or humiliation.

For many people, especially women who enjoy masochistic or submissive sex scenes, this is a taboo. A smart woman, an educated woman, a woman who seeks equality as a human being, she is supposed to be too smart to participate in such sexual tomfoolery. Such play or is politically, socially, and therefore physically, too dangerous. And it can be, given the culture we live in. Especially if you ever need to go to court. For anything. But on a less legal front…

Feminists are supposed to avoid power play exchanges. Not only are they in trouble if they “sell out” to the dark side of exploring submission, but they are nearly equally in trouble if they play on the other side and dominate. Good girls, nice girls, would never dream of being sadistic to a person she cares about. They myth that we feminists are said to be man-haters only adds to the BS of femdommes too, meaning you can get a shitload of backlash for it too.

But whatever side you are on, give or take, S&M isn’t about hate; it’s about sharing the lust, if not the love. It’s about the shared experience, each person on one side of the coin for the whole of mutual pleasure, being the yin and yang. It’s about feeding one another, sustaining the ride and feeling alive. As contrary as that sounds to many.

So S & M for me is about the duality of nature, the fact that whatever you choose it leads to taboos. There’s the desire to please others and the drive of self gratification. The pressure to appease which is a social form of bondage at odds with the pain of personal denial. Can that be any worse than any BDSM play?

Getting back to the title more directly…

Smoking today is the ultimate legal taboo. Yeah, you can legally smoke; but where you can do so is extremely limited. The airspace is controlled, and the smoker demonized; while the addiction is documented, the addicted themselves are belittled. Smoking is really sadomasochistic, and quite publicly so. On a personal level, we smokers know smoking is bad; we bring death to our lips and are said to be killing those we love. But we are still driven to do it. Even in light of the societal cost of being shunned and blamed for our own diseases (which say people with diabetes are not) many of us still do it. There’s a serious sadomasochistic drive in smoking past the “kink” that’s been sexualized into a fetish.

As for the “M”, as a woman, and a feminist, I find mirrors particularly abusive in an emotional sense. Often our perceptions of self, our societal worth in terms of looks, can lead us down dark paths which can even lead to many physical pains — from body modification and cutting to extreme dieting and other unhealthy pursuits.

On the other hand, photos featuring smoking, women posing with mirrors, have long been taboo themselves and therefore have a long erotic history of their own. Yeah, they are just plain sexy.

Then there’s the old saying about “smoke and mirrors”, which, naturally enough to my twisted mind, seems to lend itself to looking at how we deceive ourselves and — on the other side of this coin — why we are so willing to believe in what we are being sold. Be it a personal sexual fantasy, a pornographic image made just for our erotic arousal, or the larger societal message, which tell us sex is bad even as it uses sex to propel a strong economy; why do we fall for it?

At a low level, a base level, the blog exists to elicit arousal. At a higher level, I hope to get people to think about what such arousal and duality means for themselves and those who participate or dream of participating in it.

S & M = Smoke & Mirrors miss fussypants tumblrWell, that pretty much covers all of my other questions! But seriously, you have a lot of photos/posts labeled or tagged “submission” which are less obvious… Like death, boredom at work, people falling…

That’s the yin to the yang of life. Are you working to live, or living to work? Are you living or dying? Are you a moment away from something you didn’t see coming?

And sometimes, I just like the art or the image. *wink*

Like the lingerie photos.

Yes, like the lingerie. I like lingerie. And to see women wearing lingerie. (I know you get the beauty of the female form, so I don’t need to get into that, right?) But I see lingerie as part of the yin & yang too… It’s pretty, but it’s also a mirror issue; how we are seen versus how we see ourselves. Do we accept and enjoy how we appear in it? And then there’s the physical aspects of lingerie. The fabrics (usually) feel good, but are the garments comfortable? Not always. Yet we’ll still put them on. In many ways, from physical discomfort to trying to adhere to societal standards of beauty and “how to attract a mate”, lingerie is a form of bondage. Overall, most people would say lingerie is sensual, so I think it’s a nice contrast to the less accepted sensual aspects of pain.

And posts tagged “the body politic”, why aren’t they just labeled “submission”?

I guess they could be. …And maybe they should be. But then again, everything labeled submission could also be political in a sense. I guess it’s just a quirk in the way my mind works. *wink* There are a lot of quirks to be found at the blog because, despite what I said at the start of this interview, I try not to censor myself or think too much about what & why I post there.

Quirky is good.

But now for the million dollar question ~ the one every female blogger is asked: Does running a sex blog make you hot, wet, and aroused?

Hell yeah, it does! Most of the time I go there to blog to get hot. For myself or for the professional phone sex I provide (I do that under another name; I don’t wish to mix the two “personalities” as it might cramp my business style.)

And before you ask the billion dollar question — yes, my husband reaps the rewards (of both the blog and the phone sex). …I was going to make a rape pun there, but I stopped myself.

Heavens, why would you stop yourself?!

OK, my husband rapes my aching wet reward.

See? I censored myself ‘cuz it sounded rather lame. Like a lot of puns do.

Hey, I giggled!

Well, then you are one quirky lame-pun-lovin’ bitch too.

Yes; yes, I am.

If you like a little quirk with your kink, and plenty to think about, check out Miss Fussypants sexy blog.

Censored Classic Porn Review: A Dirty Western

Silent Porn Star & I watched porn together. Or, I should say, at the same time. We both took advantage of watching A Dirty Western (1975) at the same time online at Pleasure Classics, where a trial is just $4.95.

Silent Porn Star got me interested in the classic porno flick when she mentioned the film has rape fantasy scenes and still remains banned in many places. (I do so love to buck the censorship thing.) But we’ll get to those reasons and culture points of note after a regular review…

A Dirty Western is, as the title implies, an adult film based on the traditional Western film themes. The premise is that three bad men have escaped from prison and are on the lam ~ and you know they’re sure to find their sexual lambs to sacrifice, or this wouldn’t be an adult film. *wink* After the cool retro mod cartoon images set up the story line and giving the credits, we find ourselves at the rather beige homestead of a happily married couple living on the prairie in the late 1800s.

The film begins with an intimate but chatty scene between the farmer and his wife which sets up the story ~ not just the plot (including the fact that he’s soon to leave the homestead), but for some tender love-making.

There’s kissing ~ lots of kissing. Natural and rather lovey-lonesome-dovey. That’s not a bad thing at all. He fingers her pussy while he kisses her, then they fuck in the missionary. He sucks her tits, withdraws and goes down on her ~ yes, withdraws and eats her. I love that it’s not just something he does to get permission to enter.

There’s more kissing as he returns to lay by her side. Then she kisses and snuggles her way down his body to suck his cock ~ and get the money shot on his own stomach. He’s still hard enough for her to climb on top of and use him for her own pleasure. There’s a lot of hair to be seen here. (Remember, these are the days of beautiful but natural bodies in porn, that means hair. Not just on the pussies, not just at the base of cocks, but the men have more body hair than viewers of today’s porn will likely fathom.) After riding his cock, she pulls him out and rubs his semi-hard cock on her clit to finish herself off. The cheesy romantic music tells me so. Not-so-much-her-face, as Barbara Bourbon’s depiction of orgasm is rather the same as her pain face.

Dad, the farmer, leaves ~ leaves his wife and his three, yes, three, daughters, just like in all the jokes.

Meanwhile, not yet at the ranch, the three bandits are riding…

When the banditos stop to rest their horses, that’s when they spot the little house on the prairie.  The leader, complete with black eye patch, rides to get the lay of the place (heh heh) while the two sidekicks remain behind. It’s they who will spot the farmer’s three daughters, womanly daughters, who are conveniently bathing in ye olde waterhole.

None too bright, the one fresh-from-prison dude is thirsting ~ for water, leaving his wiser escapee buddy to ask him, “If you had the choice, what would you take, water or cunt?!”

Somewhere between that classic line and the next bit of film, the daughters are out in front of the barn, naked as jay birds, giggling and snapping towels at each other. (You don’t watch porn for historical accuracy, but the mod printed towels in ye olde west will likely make you giggle.)  Mom appears and admonishes them before she returns to the house.

The lead bandit spies all this, lurking around a corner, and the sight of nude women all alone must be why he passes up the sheep. *wink*

He sneaks into the house and corners the Mrs.

Naturally, she resists his advances; i.e., she wails at being told to strip. (Apparently buttons at the wrists of sleeves are more difficult to remove than the layers of skirts and petticoats.) He takes her on the kitchen table, emitting another classic line,  “Seven years, I’ll really make you scream,” if not his seed.

I love that the first to come is the first to be served (if not cum?) and he opts for the Mrs., not the farmer’s daughters. MILF rules!

Now the sidekicks arrive, on a mission to dip their heads in the dripping wet rain barrels ~ not a euphemism, they opt for drinks and splashes on their faces, and some good-natured dunking of one another, rather than the dewy nude young women.  Now we know why they are the sidekicks.

The leader, I call him Eye-patch McGee, forces mom to go outside and join her daughters. The daughters, who were as oblivious to mom’s plight as they were the thirsty gentlemen callers,  stop their towel-snapping fights and begin their frightened mewing upon seeing mom nude at gunpoint.

Now that they are all together, mother defends cubs, “Please leave my girls alone!” One of the sidekicks sniffs the clothes left on the ground by the daughters, saying, “I almost forgot what pussy smells like.” As if the real thing wasn’t right there.

Talk about a literal dumb fuck.

Into the barn they all go…

Again, mom is the first to get it, doggie (or is it horsie in a barn?) style.  Then she has to suck cock while getting it from behind. When the two sidekicks are done with mom, they leave her naked and tied to the outside of the barn, praying for her daughters who are taken away by the men. Don’t worry, help arrives from the posse looking for the escaped prisoners. But one of the men in the posse has salacious thoughts and has to be admonished that he’s as bad as the bad guys they are chasing. Mom gets dressed and joins the posse following the trail of the prisoners.

Meanwhile, the prisoners and their female captives stop for water. You know what that means ~ underwater blow jobs! And some rather homoerotic horseplay. I guess seven years is a long time and old habits are hard to break, even when cunt is around. Not that the men fuck each other, but I don’t know any guys who would bother splashing one another when they were being serviced.

There’s more horseback riding… Blah, blah, plot, blah.  The fugitives and their kidnapped women stop for a rest in some cave hideout. Here the girls hatch a plan…

In order to carry out their plan, they say they want the men to make them happy.  But escaping and raping is hard work, so the men are tired and they tell the sisters to turn themselves on, they want a little shuteye.

What are girls to do? So they start turning each other on, forming a mouth-to-pussy chain.  But now the men don’t look so sleepy… One by one they slowly wind themselves into the scene.

I won’t tell you all the details, or just when the posse and mom arrive to save the day; I will just say that dead men tell no tales.

OK, so this isn’t the best story telling. It’s not the height of acting; but it’s not much worse than the B Movie Westerns it takes it simple plot from. And why should it be any better? It’s a simple erotic fantasy (in two significant parts; tender romantic coupling and rough sex) designed to help you make love to yourself, or your partner.

A Dirty Western is no porno-parody, per se, but it does have more than a bit of kitsch and a pinch of corn that one learns to expect even from films from The Golden Age of Porn. I find humor helps ~ why should you take your self-abuse or your lovemaking so seriously? Plus, in this movie you do get better than the usual blow-me-fuck-me formulaic in one room porno.

For me, this film has everything you need in a pornographic film: a plot, several scenes/stories, humor, hot non-formulaic sex, and real looking, but attractive, bodies. Plus, A Dirty Western has the distinction of being a taboo film.

Enter Silent Porn Star and her commentary…

A Dirty Western has the distinction of what I call Cultural Significance because it has the rather rare distinction of being an adult film with modest mainstream success (because, yes, A Dirty Western was shown as an uncut hardcore porno in theaters back in The Golden Age Of Porn) — while containing taboo themes of rape and incest.

Unlike films like Hannie Caulder (1971), the rape scenes in A Dirty Western are explicit and expressly for titillating the audience; they are more than gratuitous, they are pure pornography. That’s at least one strike.

Another strike is that the three sisters are told to “turn each other on” — and that they do so.  While the threesome girl-on-girl scene is rather arousing, that’s part of the problem.  It’s incest, un-pure and simple. And it certainly doesn’t help any that the scene of the sisters plotting to distract their captors is brief, leaving an audience with shall we say ‘affected blood flow’ issues to miss that this is an actual plot point.

The next issue, or supposed third strike, is actually more myth than fact.

In the original theatrical trailer (seen in Cumming Soon!) , there’s a line that appears to have been struck before the film was released.  Near the end, when the sisters are in the cave with their captors, one of the escaped criminals grabs the youngest daughter and the sisters yell, “Not Maria, she’s a virgin!”  This has lead to the legend that video copies of this film have been cut, but all the evidence leads me to believe that this line of audio was erased prior to the film’s release to remove the taint that any of the daughters was underage.

This matter of age is also why there’s so much dialog in the first scenes of the film. The husband and wife discussing daughters of marrying age is a narrative construct which not only adds cinematic value to the work, like the rather lush horseback riding scenes, but their conversation is also there to allay audience fears and, certainly, to avoid obscenity charges for the movie and the movie’s makers. Even if the marrying age of the setting of the film has nothing to do with the legal age in 1970s America, the minors-having-sex bullet is dodged.

However, now that I’ve actually seen the classic vintage porn film, I am struck by more than the mere impossibility of such a film making it to theaters today…

[Warning: Spoiler Alert! If pornos can have endings ruined?]

Despite the film’s Production Code-esque ending, in which the villains get what’s coming to them, the most dramatic display of justice is portrayed by the mother. Even when the daughters dispense their justice, it is not portrayed with the a sense of rage, personal or moral; nor is there any sense of relief. The lack of such an emotional response coupled with the less-than-clear plotting at camp scene leaves me with a sense of ambiguity about the daughters…

I can’t help but see them not as rape victims but as women with rape fantasies. Perhaps this was by design; we’re supposed to view them as participants in rough sexual role play. It certainly would have made the censors more tolerant. Not to mention appease audiences who wanted to enjoy their arousal without any nagging worries. I know that worked for this woman who enjoys her own rape fantasies. Even if the incest thing was a bit difficult to get past.

Those of you who’ve seen the film are encouraged to share your thoughts.


Barbara Bourbon
Richard O’Neal
Geoff Parker (as Geoffrey Parker)
Dick Payne
Levi Richards
Vern Rossi
Starlyn Simone (as Simone)
April Grant (as Lois Grant)
Gloria Hope
Lee O’Donnell (as L.Q. O’Donnell)
Sonny Franzese

Written & Directed by Joseph F. Robertson
VCX, 71 minutes