The Biological Drives Behind Some Holiday Food Traditions

Yesterday, my man and I celebrated Steak & BJ Day ~ with a few modifications. We do not really celebrate Valentine’s Day. (I am, after all, a “curvy man.”) Our Steak & BJ Day rather combines the two holidays, perhaps… It begins with me going down on him, pleasuring him orally, as foreplay before the big event ~ which, yes, is vaginal sex. After that, we eat steak. Simple? Yes. Delightful? Absolutely.

And it’s not necessarily reserved for March 14th, either.

But this whole idea of food and holidays has me thinking of a recent study.

This study showed that when women found themselves with an attractive male, they opted for healthy foods ~ yet men exposed to an attractive woman opted for expensive drinking and dining options.

This does not surprise me one bit. (Not many of these sex or attraction studies do, frankly.)

It makes absolute sense to me that women faced with a potential attractive male mate would be thinking about their health. And not because I believe that women are trying to “be skinny” or otherwise trying to conform to media portrayals of female bodies [insert rant here]. Such conclusions are tedious. Not to mention that making such an assumption is a big leap; “healthy” doesn’t equate “skinniness.” Let’s stick with the notion of health, shall we.

Most of the things we consider to be signs of female beauty are actually flags for fertility. It’s only natural ~ part of our species biological imperative ~ for women to be considering their health when presented with a potential mate.

Similarly, men, who have identified a genetic beauty worthy of insemination would be interested in showcasing their status as excellent providers ~ a la sparing no expense in providing a large display of food and drink.

Again, you can call it sexist, but there’s science and biological drives behind it all.

So is it any wonder then, that women would want men to display their monetary protector/provider status from time to time ~ including honoring anniversaries and “made up Hallmark holidays” like Valentine’s Day?

Here’s a tip, menfolk: If you want her to be more sexually available, try showing her what a big providing man you are. It could be food or chocolates; it could be jewelry. It could be a car. But gifts are always good. Even if Especially if it’s not even a holiday.


A Valentine For Male Chastity

“All keyed up to ask you to be my valentine!”

Suitable to send your femdom or other keyholder; as well as for kinksters into BDSM.

Vintage valentine for sale here; via TrailerTrashGrl.

Sunday Funnies: Dicks Pop Up Everywhere!

Peter Piper may have picked a peck of pickled peppers, but the poor bloke who picked this daisy doing the “loves me, loves me not” petal thing certainly got a surprise! Hey, flowers are the sex organs of plants, so you’d best take care when pulling there. *wink* Via.

loves me loves me not vintage card

sure enough pop up vintage valentine surprise

Valentine Inspiration: Tea Cups and Saucers

Don’t look at me like that. I know Valentine’s Day is a mere one day and four minutes away (as I type this). But, I just had the idea and… ideas are for sharing even if they are a bit late-ish.

valentine tea cup

Etsy: ShoponSherman


If you haven’t got something for your Valentine yet… consider a pretty tea cup and saucer. Who doesn’t drink tea sometime? Even I (the coffee lover) have stacks of tea (loose and bagged) which I slip into occasionally. I don’t get a tea cup and saucer out but I do have them so the option is always there.

I found a few perfectly pink and pretty Valentine tea cups and saucers on Etsy. Then one divine red one which I love but can’t let myself buy.

valentine tea

Etsy: TheVintageFind1

Due to the lateness of the idea, you can find lovely Valentine tea cups and saucers at a store near you too. Look for those fussy kind of gift shops and stores like Hallmark (the greeting card retail outlets). Fussy, frilly places will often have tea cups (and matching saucers) if they sell stuff of any kind.

pink Valentine cup

Etsy: AprilsLuxuries

Of course, you can go all out and pick up an entire tea set. But, that could get really expensive (and fragile to cart home) when one tea cup can range in price from $10 to $90. Don’t forget thrift stores! I often find a selection of tea cups and saucers just waiting for new homes there too.

Links to find the Valentine tea cups from this post:

What Do Women Really Want for Valentine’s Day

valentine cardThe traditional flowers, candy, jewelry, cards, dinner, lingerie and love making don’t make the list for every woman. My own feelings about Valentine’s Day come from my romantic, sometimes practical nature along with a bit of contrariness and daring-do. Following is a list for my Valentine but may be helpful for other Valentines too.


Flowers I’d like, if they still have roots. Cut flowers look great for awhile but I feel sad when I have to put them out to compost. I wouldn’t turn down cut flowers and I’d be really happy for a few days. So flowers are still a good choice and they look fresh and alive which is really what flowers are all about, I think.


Candy is trickier. First, I’m trying to avoid sugar and it isn’t easy because I enjoy chocolate, cheesecake and ice cream. A vanilla ice cream with swirls of chocolate and caramel… but, I know I shouldn’t think about such things.

Another problem with candy and sweets is finding something that really is good. So much of it is artificial and only looks good. Candy can be very disappointing. I’d just skip it and consider other Valentine ideas.


Jewelry is pricey, unless you found it or got it out of a bubble gum machine. So I don’t expect jewels for Valentine’s Day. Save those sparkling things for bigger events which have more meaning, like an anniversary of a wedding or a baby being born. Besides, you really would need to know just what I like to pick something I’d love when it comes to jewelry. I don’t think I’d want a guy I actually like to have that kind of pressure.

Valentine Card

A Valentine card is great. But, I like something just right. Not overly mushy with stuff you don’t really mean but thought sounded good when you read the card in the store. I like something only a little sentimental, something believable. What I really like about a card is a great personal and hand written message inside and a fabulous image or drawing on the outside. I love a card with red hearts, roses and other romantic things. Don’t forget the envelope – you can doodle hearts and flowers for extra romance.

Romantic Dinner

Dinner out is nice. But, not spectacular. Make me a dinner at home and I’d be far more impressed. Especially if you clean up before I get there so I don’t see the dirty pots, pans and hear the dishwasher still running in the background. A romantic dinner at home is great if you work at setting the mood. I don’t want to see dirty dishes, laundry, kids not in bed yet and start multi-tasking.

If you make dinner at home use a recipe you already know or have at least tried a couple of times. Consider something messy like spaghetti as a poor choice when both of you are likely to be dressed up and won’t like spots of sauce on your clothes. Something requiring extra tools, like crab legs, aren’t a great choice either. Keep it simple and work with ingredients you know. Beware of food allergies.


Lingerie is a pretty personal choice for a woman. Self esteem, body issues and confidence get all wrapped up in the choice of what we wear and what makes us feel sexy. Colour is important. Size matters. What you think would look great may be something she would never wear and if she did put it on to please you she may feel very unsexy. So lingerie, though it sounds like a good idea, may be too risky. If she is interested in Valentine lingerie – take her out for a shopping trip on Valentine’s Day. Let her pick something that you both can enjoy. Why not pick up something sexy for yourself too?

Love Making

The love making part should be about romance, making love and for me, I want the romance first. I want to feel appreciated and know I look hot to him. Women get in the mood in different ways. I like being the one in charge, leading and teasing and laughing. There have been cases of exhibitionism, flashing for fun and pleasure. But, if you want to get to the love making you need to find out what gets her to that point. Don’t wait for Valentine’s Day to find out. Talk together. You may get a lot more out of the conversation than you expect.

The Valentine card in this post comes from Etsy: VintageRecycling I looked at a lot of cards but this is the only one I really wanted to choose for myself.

Hot Ties for Men on Valentine’s Day

I can’t choose between these two neckties. Either would be a great Valentine’s Day choice. Afterwards, if you’re lucky, she can tie them around your wrists instead.

They call this “red burgundy ripple:” but I think it looks like waves of flame. 
valentinetie1This one has a touch of the old fashioned style with the red paisley.

How to Look Good in Slutty Boxer Shorts (for Men)

Valentine’s Day is coming up next month. It’s a time of wine, roses, chocolates and love making for those who have someone to love (in that way). So for men I thought I would write about dressing to impress with less. Go for the slutty boxer shorts.

slutty Valentine

These Valentines boxers were found via Target.


Let’s be clear about the slutty men thing before I get to the boxer shorts. I’m not thinking a slutty man is a guy waving his dick around acting like a man starring in his own pornographic movie. A slutty man makes the effort to attract women rather than being the star of his own show (alone). The old fashioned phrase was ‘ladies man’ but these days a partner isn’t always a woman.

Valentine man set

This is a nice set. Nice because satin is so touchable. Found at Zaphon.

Working the Slutty Boxer Shorts

Bring out your slutty boxer shorts (if you buy online consider time for shipping and shop early).

  • Check the waistband, get a good quality elastic. You want them to stay on until you plan to take them off.
  • Make sure the shorts fit you rather than hang too low.
  • Avoid form fitting shorts. Even if you have a perfect muscular body (which most of us don’t) create romance rather than being obvious.
  • Pay attention to fabric. Silky satins are nice to touch, to smooth your fingers over. Cotton is soft and touchable too. Some fabrics are starchy though and less enjoyable to touch.
  • Get boxers with a longer leg to them. For romance your best assets are above the waistline.
  • Red is the traditional colour for Valentine’s Day so we’re going to shop for boxer shorts which are brilliantly red. A deeper shade of red suggests passion so skip any red which looks orange-ish or lighter red. If you are colour blind get help or just don’t worry about it. A great shade of red is a bonus but not essential.

male model shortsThese would be good for a male model but most guys won’t look comfortable and sexy in something this form fitting and short. I found these on eBay.The tuxedo look is cute and would work for more occasions, if you’re a thrifty shopper.


Don’t forget to get cleaned up. Look good and smell good too!

Set the stage for romance. Women will not have their mind on romance in a messy/ dirty room so plan ahead.